HOW WE PLAN TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD WITH A CLEAN ENERGY DRINK.
We thought it couldn’t get any worse when people began dancing on the internet for an app named after a damn clock. But we were wrong. Unassuming masses of people are drinking B.S. ingredients from energy drinks by the crapload. They have no idea what it’s doing to their bodies.
Something needed to be done. We came up with a nefarious plan to solve all these problems by eliminating these B.S. ingredients. But we must take over the world to do so. We will assemble a great energized army to begin this Energy Revolution. We scoured the universe to find a solution to this problem. This is why we took to our lair deep in the wilderness atop Mount Repeak. We created three never-before-seen things to aid our revolution:
- A wild crazy ape named, Bionic Bigfoot. We used the original DNA from Bigfoot and a few spare autonomous robot parts we had laying around. He has one extremely powerful mechanical leg that will curb-stomp countless B.S. Ingredients.
- A flying mega-energized steed with lightning power. She is the glorious, Lightning Bird. She's here to slay B.S. ingredients in battle with Bionic Bigfoot, and to help deliver Repeak to the masses.
- Repeak, is a 100% bonafide damn clean energy drink. The cleanest in the universe. It’s made of the simplest and cleanest ingredients. Such as fruit juice and organic caffeine. One sip will transform any living creature into an Energy-Beast with unlimited power. This will fuel our energized army and our Energy Revolution.
We need your help to conquer the world and end the B.S. ingredients that are filling our energy drinks. Join The Revolution, Drink Repeak.